Memo to all Employees

[IRISHLADSTABLE]

Memo to all Employees:


In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and
productivity from employees, it will be our policy to keep
all employees well trained through our program of
SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T)


We are trying to give our employees more S.H.I.T than
anyone else. If you feel that you do not receive your share
of S.H.I.T on the course, please see your supervisor. You
will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T list, and
our supervisors are especially skilled at seeing you get all
the S. H. I. T. you can handle.

Employees who don't take their S. H. I.T. will be placed in
DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T).

Those who fail to take D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T seriously will have to
go to EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T).

Since our supervisors took S.H.I.T before they were promoted,
they don't have to take S.H.I.T anymore, and are all full of S.H.I.T already.

If you are full of S.H.I.T, you may be interested in a job
teaching others. We can add your name to our
BASIC UNDERSTANDING LIST of LEADERS (B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T).

For employees who are intending to pursue a career in manage-
ment and consulting, we will refer you to the department of
MANAGERIAL OPERATIONAL RESEARCH EDUCATION (MO.R.E.S.H.I.T).

This course emphasizes how to manage M.O.R.E. S.H.I.T

If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF TEACHING,
SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T).


Thank you,

BOSS IN GENERAL, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (B.I.G.S.H.I.T)


P.S.-Now send this S.H.I.T to 5 people who need S.H.I.T in their life, just
not the same person who sent you this S.H.I.T They have already had their fill of S.H.I.T

Thank you for your time.



Sincerely,

(The D.U.M.B.S.H.I.T).
The Director Under the Main Bureau of Super High Intensity Training.

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing."

"To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer"