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03-14-2019, 09:56 PM
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#1
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: central fla.
Posts: 4,874
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Did you know that I'm as Omnipotent as
The almighty.....
True story today...(not as good as THE Teach)
A customer told me today that none of her fruit trees brought from us had borne any fruit at all last year....after about 20 seconds of daze/pause...I asked what she had...She proceeded to volunteer that she had peaches...which last spring had produced the start of small fruit but then a late freeze came along.....and wiped them out
After about a 45 second stunned pause on my part....I asked....so you're equating me with God....and that I'm in charge of the weather....
Let That sink in...
So then I said...well...everybody better thank God that I'm not that powerful...and that perhaps she might have bountiful crop this year...cause Fla. shouldn't have anymore freezes at this point......but THEN again...who knows....
So don't mess with moi....or I'll freeze or drown or blow away your fruit...Got it...
__________________
got handed a lemon...make lemonade....add sugar or brown sugar or stevia or my personal favorite....miracle fruit....google it...thank me later...
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03-14-2019, 10:19 PM
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#2
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 22,395
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you should have upsold portable greenhouse that she should have used when weather below 40 degrees and since she didn't it was her fault
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03-15-2019, 01:15 PM
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#3
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 28,363
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God doesn't have to issue refunds to dissatisfied customers. Otherwise...he'd be out of business eons ago.
__________________
Live to play another day.
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03-15-2019, 01:44 PM
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#4
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 46,873
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thaskalos
God doesn't have to issue refunds to dissatisfied customers. Otherwise...he'd be out of business eons ago.
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Really? He's not infinitely filthy rich?
__________________
Consistent profits can only be made on the basis of analysis that is far from obvious to the majority. - anonymous guru
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03-15-2019, 02:02 PM
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#5
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 28,363
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boxcar
Really? He's not infinitely filthy rich?
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If he is so "filthy rich"...why does he keep needing more money? The "believers" keep giving and giving...but the money never seems to be enough.
__________________
Live to play another day.
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03-15-2019, 02:11 PM
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#6
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 46,873
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thaskalos
If he is so "filthy rich"...why does he keep needing more money? The "believers" keep giving and giving...but the money never seems to be enough.
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He doesn't need a thing. It's his faithful shepherds of the gospel who need the support of the flock.
__________________
Consistent profits can only be made on the basis of analysis that is far from obvious to the majority. - anonymous guru
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03-15-2019, 02:20 PM
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#7
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 28,363
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boxcar
He doesn't need a thing. It's his faithful shepherds of the gospel who need the support of the flock.
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Gee, Boxcar...how much "support from the flock" do these 'faithful shepherds' need? These "faithful shepards" already wear expensive Italian shoes and drive Mercedeses...while Jesus was in sandals and rode atop a donkey? Have the times really changed that much?
__________________
Live to play another day.
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03-15-2019, 02:56 PM
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#8
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 46,873
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thaskalos
Gee, Boxcar...how much "support from the flock" do these 'faithful shepherds' need? These "faithful shepards" already wear expensive Italian shoes and drive Mercedeses...while Jesus was in sandals and rode atop a donkey? Have the times really changed that much?
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I did say "faithful" shepherds. There are many "shepherds" who aren't so faithful. But the faithful ones are "free from the love of money" (1Tim 3:3).
__________________
Consistent profits can only be made on the basis of analysis that is far from obvious to the majority. - anonymous guru
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03-15-2019, 03:08 PM
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#9
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Denver
Posts: 4,163
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boxcar
Really? He's not infinitely filthy rich?
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He doesn't need the money. If he wants an orange he just says orange. New robes - he just waves his hand and Ralph Lauren pops up. He wants to see the 3 horse win the fourth race - he makes sure Kent Desormeaux takes out half the field and the 3 sneaks up the rail to win by 2 3/4.
If Lauren gets hit by a lightning bolt you can be sure the big guy didn't like the sparkles on the new robe.
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03-15-2019, 03:21 PM
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#10
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 10,935
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Moose/Meese
Quote:
Originally Posted by thaskalos
already wear expensive Italian shoes and drive Mercedeses...
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I think there should be a separate word for more than one.
__________________
All I needed in life I learned from Gary Larson.
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03-15-2019, 03:31 PM
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#11
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 46,873
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HalvOnHorseracing
He doesn't need the money.
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Now you're catching on. God's existence is not contingent on anything. He never needed anything, he doesn't need anything and he never will need anything.
Quote:
If he wants an orange he just says orange. New robes - he just waves his hand and Ralph Lauren pops up. He wants to see the 3 horse win the fourth race - he makes sure Kent Desormeaux takes out half the field and the 3 sneaks up the rail to win by 2 3/4.
If Lauren gets hit by a lightning bolt you can be sure the big guy didn't like the sparkles on the new robe.
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You should have quit while you were ahead.
__________________
Consistent profits can only be made on the basis of analysis that is far from obvious to the majority. - anonymous guru
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03-15-2019, 03:40 PM
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#12
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 28,363
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boxcar
Now you're catching on. God's existence is not contingent on anything. He never needed anything, he doesn't need anything and he never will need anything.
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Then...why does he demand such adoration from man?
__________________
Live to play another day.
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03-15-2019, 03:59 PM
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#13
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 46,873
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thaskalos
Then...why does he demand such adoration from man?
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He doesn't demand "adoration". But the first and greatest commandment is to love Him with our whole being. Why? Who is more supremely worthy? Who is infinitely worthy of our love?
Moreover, love is the highest, purest, greatest and most noble of all the virtues.
__________________
Consistent profits can only be made on the basis of analysis that is far from obvious to the majority. - anonymous guru
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03-15-2019, 04:16 PM
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#14
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 28,363
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But...
Quote:
Originally Posted by boxcar
He doesn't demand "adoration". But the first and greatest commandment is to love Him with our whole being. Why? Who is more supremely worthy? Who is infinitely worthy of our love?
Moreover, love is the highest, purest, greatest and most noble of all the virtues.
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When I COMMAND you to love and obey me, and I threaten you with "punishment" if you don't...then, what does this say of me?
__________________
Live to play another day.
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03-15-2019, 04:34 PM
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#15
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The Voice of Reason!
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Canandaigua, New york
Posts: 112,354
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thaskalos
When I COMMAND you to love and obey me, and I threaten you with "punishment" if you don't...then, what does this say of me?
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That you are a God?
__________________
Who does the Racing Form Detective like in this one?
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