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03-07-2021, 11:46 AM
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#1
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Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 4,668
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Want to REALLY fix America?
Hey, Mr Prez, just a few suggestions on how to ACTUALLY make things better:
1) Outlaw click bait . You know, the sort of "They brought home what they thought was a mere box turtle-but were shocked when they learned it's TRUE species!" thing that drags out for 40 screens? And ban those god-AWFUL writers from ever typing another word. Ever.
2) Require ALL clothing outlets to stock PLENTY of xxxxxxL sizes. And all manufacturers to make them in each item and style. Have you walked through Walmart lately? Here's a hint: Modern Americans are not petite. (Please, though, no more "skinny jeans" in 52 waist size" I spent 30 minutes at a big and tall store last week arguing to some arrogant manager that tags proclaiming "these ride low on your hips-just the way you like" are not an inducement for big guys to buy.)
3) Mandate public hanging for maleware artists and identity thieves. And minimum 5 year prison terms for the ceo of any company sending popup ads to my computer. And if the popup strategically blocks my bottom scroll button, make it 10 years.
4) Shut down any company whose products are too difficult to open. Want a conspiracy theory? I believe thousands of people per day sustain significant injury in struggling with multiple layers of impenetrable barriers that things even as innocuous as tums or rolaids come packaged in. NOBODY can tell me that lots of people dont end up screaming and slashing in mindless rage with kitchen knives and potentially lethal screwdrivers at any multitude of unasailable packaging designs. Surely this sometimes ends badly. VERY badly is My guess. But we never hear of these inevitable tragedies because these poor, aggreived (now one-eyed) persons recieve hush money or mysteriously disappear.
5) Force Flo to stop using that ghastly bright red lipstick.
More to come.........
Last edited by mountainman; 03-07-2021 at 11:48 AM.
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03-07-2021, 02:13 PM
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#2
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Librocubicularist
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Ohio
Posts: 10,466
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mountainman
Hey, Mr Prez, just a few suggestions on how to ACTUALLY make things better:
1) Outlaw click bait . You know, the sort of "They brought home what they thought was a mere box turtle-but were shocked when they learned it's TRUE species!" thing that drags out for 40 screens? And ban those god-AWFUL writers from ever typing another word. Ever.
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Great idea! Unfortunately SCOTUS would strike it down as violating the 1st amendment.
__________________
Sapere aude
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03-07-2021, 02:21 PM
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#3
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Registered User
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Boston+Ocala
Posts: 23,757
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the very best way to help out America would be to make a law that they have to stagger post times for all horse races, and never allow more than 4 tracks to run at the same time. you should never allow all these tracks to run at prime time all at once.
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03-07-2021, 04:21 PM
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#4
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 28,549
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And enough with this bullshit about how today's cashless transactions at the store are more efficient than they were back in the day when the customers were mainly using cash when out shopping. Remember all those TV commercials where the customers merrily paraded past the smiling cashier at a steady tempo while their credit cards were quickly scanned in a rapid "ding...ding...ding" fashion? BULLSHIT! All I see is utter delay and confusion, as the customers keep arguing with the cashiers because their credit phone-cards are not correctly scanned by the scanners. By the way...do they still call them "CASH registers"?
__________________
Live to play another day.
Last edited by thaskalos; 03-07-2021 at 04:24 PM.
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03-07-2021, 04:56 PM
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#5
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Librocubicularist
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Ohio
Posts: 10,466
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thaskalos
Remember all those TV commercials where the customers merrily paraded past the smiling cashier...
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Cashiers will be mostly gone by 2030. More and more stores (Wal Mart, Kroger, Home Depot, ...) have self checkout where you scan and bag your stuff, then scan your card, or else put cash into the machine and it makes change.
__________________
Sapere aude
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03-07-2021, 05:02 PM
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#6
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 28,549
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Actor
Cashiers will be mostly gone by 2030. More and more stores (Wal Mart, Kroger, Home Depot, ...) have self checkout where you scan and bag your stuff, then scan your card, or else put cash into the machine and it makes change.
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Yeah...I see how smoothly that's been working out too.
At the Walmart that I patronize...the self-checkout section is roped off 50% of the time.
__________________
Live to play another day.
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03-07-2021, 05:33 PM
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#7
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PA Steward
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Del Boca Vista
Posts: 88,612
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Technology certainly has ensured a smooth process towards limiting human-to-human contact.
COVID even more so.
I wonder where this is all heading.
Whatever happens, majoring in Psychology is probably the best move for any incoming freshman. There is going to be a huge uptick in demand for psychotherapy in the very near future.
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03-07-2021, 05:37 PM
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#8
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Mukwonago, WI
Posts: 3,208
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thaskalos
And enough with this bullshit about how today's cashless transactions at the store are more efficient than they were back in the day when the customers were mainly using cash when out shopping. Remember all those TV commercials where the customers merrily paraded past the smiling cashier at a steady tempo while their credit cards were quickly scanned in a rapid "ding...ding...ding" fashion? BULLSHIT! All I see is utter delay and confusion, as the customers keep arguing with the cashiers because their credit phone-cards are not correctly scanned by the scanners. By the way...do they still call them "CASH registers"?
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How about the customers who act like they have never paid at a register with a credit card, and never have their card ready...
__________________
"I don't always frequent message boards, but when I do, I prefer PaceAdvantage."
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03-07-2021, 05:50 PM
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#9
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Just Deplorable
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Lebanon, Ohio
Posts: 8,068
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I'd rather be behind one of those than someone paying cash digging around a bottomless purse for exact change.
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03-07-2021, 06:20 PM
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#10
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Authorized Advertiser
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Oakland, Ca
Posts: 7,953
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wisconsin
How about the customers who act like they have never paid at a register with a credit card, and never have their card ready...
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Even worse - people paying by check, wait til everything is rung up...and ONLY THEN do they begin digging in their purse for their checkbook, pen, ID, etc.
So I do my shopping at 7-11. On Wed. nights, my wife would work late so it was up to me to provide dinner for our two kids. A quick stop at 7-11 on the way home from work--pick up a pack of hot dogs, buns, and a can of chili. You can guess what was on the menu that night.
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03-07-2021, 07:22 PM
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#11
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Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Reno, NV
Posts: 16,910
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My dear friends...
We speak of fixing America and THIS is the best we can come up with?
PS: Don't forget to watch Oprah interview those two soon-to-be-excommunicated royals tonight.
(Must put things in their proper perspective. LOL)
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03-07-2021, 07:27 PM
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#12
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 28,549
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The only way to "fix America" is by fixing ourselves first.
__________________
Live to play another day.
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03-07-2021, 07:39 PM
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#13
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2020
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 1,086
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We have met the enemy and they are us.
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03-07-2021, 07:54 PM
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#14
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2004
Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 14,478
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thaskalos
The only way to "fix America" is by fixing ourselves first.
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Too late, do you think all the people coming across the southern border are going to get the better life that they seek? Most are going to be pressed into military service to die in country's other than the United States. The vast majority have no marketable skills and do not understand that the paper our soon to be 30 trillion dollar debt will demand soon people to go to foreign lands and police the world. Many here think getting rid of Saddam Hussein Abd al-Majid al-Tikriti was George W. Bush's war. Or think Muammar Muhammad Abu Minyar al-Gaddafi death warrant did not originate in a yearly meeting. The very same meeting that will call for Bashar Hafez al-Assad to be next. And as sure as the seasons change he will be gone like Gaddafi.
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03-07-2021, 09:06 PM
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#15
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Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 4,668
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dave Schwartz
My dear friends...
We speak of fixing America and THIS is the best we can come up with?
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My bad, Dave-for neglecting to include that ALL fast-food franchises, not just Wendy's, should offer diet cherry dr pepper.
Are we good now?
Last edited by mountainman; 03-07-2021 at 09:07 PM.
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