Sorry I didn't give this one out, but it was only at about two minutes prior to post time that I learned that Ducky Drake was entered in today's G. Malleah Stakes at Turf Paradise. I had TVG on the tube when my wife screamed "Look, Yobo, it's Ducky Drake!" "Better go bet him, then," I half-joked as I scurried upstairs to register a token wager at my computer. "
Neh! [Korean for "yes"], the Better Half approves. A minute later, my wife announces that DD's odds have risen to six to one. I answer that I didn't bet much--only $7--as I hadn't had time to scope the race, money remains tight, and I'm about to drop through the thin ice I've been skating on at work. "You told me you won two hundred dollars the other night; you should bet a hundred on him." Back upstairs as the field loads; point, click--but too late (actually, I was only going to put another eight on the Duckster).
Twenty-one and one-fifth seconds later, Ducky Drake must be
thirty (that's three zero) lengths behind the leaders, though it's impossible to tell, as the camera can't pan far enough back to pick up the trailer, who's
much farther behind the next-to-last runner than that one lags behind the pacesetters. "Oh, no," pessimises the Spouse, "wha' hoppen'?"). Turning for home, he's still not even in the picture. Passing the 3/16 pole, DD is still last. All of a sudden, the namesake begins to make like Pegasus. Well inside the 1/16 pole, DD is still three lengths from the lead, but Wifey's already celebrating: "
Got 'im!" And so he did.
"I'm MAD at you," sulks Mrs. Falconridge after the OFFICIAL sign appears (Ducky Drake pays $16.40 to win). "Why don't you
listen to me? Besides, that's
my money;
I told you who to bet."
Reminds me of a scene in
Raging Bull. Joe Pesci to a befuddled Bobby DeNiro: "If you win, you win; even if you lose, you win." In my case that's been turned upside down: if I lose, I lose. Even if I win, I still lose.
