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a handicapper sitting in the stands holding several $50.00 win tickets on a front runner he considered a "lock" leading by 7 lengths. the speed horse loses his jockey 50 yards short of the finish...as the tickets fall to the ground our handicapper slips quietly into the next world. as he wakes up he listens to a doctor lists his qualifications for admission to Heaven
"look St Peter, i'm a doctor i have healed the sick and cured the lame"
St Peter says "Yes my son but you have also grown arrogant, unfeeling and greedy. You must spend time 'Down Below' next a lawyer. "I have studied long and hard to master the law. To serve the cause of justice, to protect the rights of all mankind" St Peter looks at him and says "You have also borne false witness and coveted all thy neighbors possessions" you will spend time 'Down below' the handicapper hears all of the discussion and turns to follow the other two. St Peter calls him back. "Why do you follow those 2 my son?" "I don't have their education or training. i have never done a great deal for my fellow man...I'm due to spend a long time 'Down below'
"one moment my son..what was your earthly calling"
"Me? I was a handicapper" St.Peter, "You mean you tried to pick winners of a horse race?" "yes". St peter "before the race was run" "yes before the race was run"
St peter shakes his head in disbelief and breaks into a smile as he swings open the Pearly gates and says" You come in my son, you have been through Hell already!!!"
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Buy Sam a drink and get His dog one Too--->mlang
and now in Lancaster, CA.
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