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Thread: HUMOR
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Old 11-15-2014, 06:08 PM   #665
OntheRail
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A primate biologist finds an orphan male gorilla in the African rain forest and decides to raise it as a human. He teaches it to do everything except speak - but it can wear clothes, dance, eat with utensils, drive a car, go to the office and work, play golf, etc. Arnold Palmer reads about it on CNN and decides enough is enough so he challenges the gorilla to a golf game for a grand pot of one million dollars and a bonus of $100,000 per hole. Word leaks out and the media shows up from all over the world, headlines blaring, "Arnold Palmer vs. Ape Man - Match of a Lifetime!"

The gorilla shows up alone except for the biologist, who acts as his interpreter. Palmer shows up with over fifty people in his entourage. The gorilla is wearing a complete set of golf togs, accurate down to his shoes and has a complete set of Callaway golf clubs. Arnold is pretty disgusted so he readily agrees to let the gorilla go first. Hole 1 is a 430 yard, par 5, with three sand traps and a dogleg to the left to make par. The gorilla steps up to the tee, checks the wind, and proceeds to hit a massive drive, which sails out to make a vast hook to the left and eventually drops to the green, finally rolling perfectly to make a hole in one.

Arnold is smart enough to know a good thing when he sees it and quickly decides discretion is the better part of valor so he concedes the match. After the press departs, he quietly pulls the biologist aside and says, "He drives like no one in the history of golf - how is his putting game?". The biologist replies a bit slyly, "Same way, 430 yards, dog-leg to the left."
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