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[thaskalos]

The following joke was narrated by Larry Merchant in his 1973 book The National Football Lottery:

A man keeps walking into a bank and depositing $5,000 into his account every single day. After about 6 consecutive months of this, the bank president notices the man's curious transaction history, and leaves word with the tellers that he'd like to meet this depositor on his next bank visit. The man shows up at the bank the very next day to make his usual deposit, and the teller tells him that the bank president is anxious to meet him. The man obliges...and he soon finds himself in the office of the curious banker.

"It's very unusual to see a depositor with your level of consistency...and I wanted us to get a little better acquainted", the banker says. "Would you mind if I asked you what you do for a living?".

"I am a professional gambler", the man replies.

"A GAMBLER?", the banker asks incredulously. "I thought gamblers usually lose".

"Not me. I win every single day", the man answers assuredly.

"But, HOW?" the banker asks in disbelief.

"Why don't I make a bet with you right now...so I could prove my point?", the man asks. "I'll bet you $5,000 that, when I come to the bank at noon tomorrow to make my usual deposit...you will have square balls".

"What do you mean?", asks the banker.

"I will come into your office tomorrow at noon, I'll reach into your underwear, and I'll give you $5,000 if your balls aren't square", explains the man, without even a trace of a smile.

The banker eagerly accepts the wager...and the depositor leaves and goes about his business.

Next day noon comes around...and there is a knock on the bank president's office door. The banker opens the door...and the gambler walks in accompanied by a bespectacled middle-aged man. The banker apprehensively lowers his pants and underwear...and the gambler reaches and grabs hold of the banker's balls...as the bespectacled bystander gasps in disbelief.

"See? You lost $5,000", says the banker.

"Not quite", replies the gambler. "A little earlier today...I bet my accountant here $10,000 that, by noon today, I'd have the bank president by the balls".