Lockdown humor
People are using the word lockdown because they don't know how to spell kwarinteen.
I'm pretty sure I just heard my fridge say, "What the heck do you want now?!"
Ontario has banned groups larger than 5. If you're a family of 6, you're about to find out who's the least favorite.
Health Tip: If you keep a glass of wine in each hand, you can't accidentally touch your face.
My house got TP'd ("toilet papered")last night ... it's now appraised value has doubled!
Smoking pot and skipping school had me in trouble constantly. Now weed's legal and school's closed ... kids today are livin' the dream!
This is great. I just tried to make my own hand sanitizer and it came out as a rum & coke!
After a few days of not going out, I saw someone I knew walking by on the sidewalk outside. I immediately ran to the window and started yelling to them. Now I understand dogs.
Day 36 of social isolation at home, and it's like being in Las Vegas. I'm losing money by the minute. Cocktails are acceptable at any hour. Nobody knows what time it is.
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