I'm sorry to hear this, CJ. A loved one's pain is also your pain.
I want to pass something by you which may help or may not.
"
Interestingly, serum levels of DHEA are decreased in patients with inflammatory disease including lupus, and these levels seem to inversely correlate with disease activity. Following encouraging studies demonstrating beneficial effects of DHEA supplementation in murine lupus models, a number of clinical studies have tested the effect of DHEA administration in lupus patients. DHEA treatment could improve patient’s overall quality of life assessment measures and glucocorticoid requirements in some lupus patients with mild to moderate disease,......" (from the link below)
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2701249/
About 15 or 20 years ago, I started taking DHEA supplements, mainly because I read that it decreases in your body as you age. 3 days later, my chronic back pain went away and never came back. Later, I saw on television that it helps with arthritis. What I'm saying here is that it should be safe for anyone to take since your body already creates it. DHEA breaks down into testosterone and estrogen biased towards your sex, I guess. If she decides to take it, I'd start with 25mg daily and 50mg later, the dose I take now. You can buy it in supermarkets or the Internet anywhere. I use iHerb.com.