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Search: Posts Made By: Shemp Howard
Forum: Off Topic - General 09-17-2016, 04:39 PM
Replies: 8
Views: 677
Posted By Shemp Howard
Wasn't Obama just in Philadelphia to speak with...

Wasn't Obama just in Philadelphia to speak with the city "activists"?
Forum: General Racing Discussion 09-15-2016, 08:50 PM
Replies: 28
Views: 1,819
Posted By Shemp Howard
Until they come out with crooked legs and then...

Until they come out with crooked legs and then you wind up selling them to some vanity stable for a big loss.
Forum: Off Topic - General 09-12-2016, 10:37 PM
Replies: 1
Views: 418
Posted By Shemp Howard
Miss Arkansas Is Miss America 2016

Anyone hear that Bill is in Atlantic City, NJ campaigning for his pants suit ball of chain?
Forum: Off Topic - General 09-12-2016, 10:35 PM
Replies: 10,920
Views: 761,746
Posted By Shemp Howard
Trump odds to win drop to 11-8. Time to go...

Trump odds to win drop to 11-8.

Time to go to the windows.
...
Forum: Off Topic - General 09-12-2016, 09:17 PM
Replies: 1,666
Views: 349,391
Posted By Shemp Howard
A guy walked into a crowded bar, waving his...

A guy walked into a crowded bar, waving his unholstered pistol and yelled, "I have a 45 caliber Colt 1911 with a seven round clip plus one in the chamber and I want to know who's been sleeping with...
Forum: Off Topic - General 09-11-2016, 09:48 PM
Replies: 4,484
Views: 426,028
Posted By Shemp Howard
From a "basket of deplorables" to a deplorable...

From a "basket of deplorables" to a deplorable basket case in the space of 24 hours. Priceless!
Forum: General Racing Discussion 09-08-2016, 09:47 PM
Replies: 50
Views: 4,451
Posted By Shemp Howard
The Race Commissions seem bent on keeping this...

The Race Commissions seem bent on keeping this information under wraps.

I've been trying to get information on a horse that was disqualified from a winning purse at Penn National for almost two...
Forum: General Racing Discussion 09-04-2016, 11:01 PM
Replies: 45
Views: 4,376
Posted By Shemp Howard
You could have claimed Page McKenney several...

You could have claimed Page McKenney several times at the Pig Penn in Grantville for $16K.

He's won $1.4 million.
Forum: Off Topic - Sports 09-03-2016, 08:16 AM
Replies: 16
Views: 2,212
Posted By Shemp Howard
You should have gone to Timonium.

You should have gone to Timonium.
Forum: Off Topic - General 09-01-2016, 08:41 PM
Replies: 1,666
Views: 349,391
Posted By Shemp Howard
Crazy Mike was seriously injured in a freak...

Crazy Mike was seriously injured in a freak accident moving tack from one stable to another. The prognosis was not good.

Late in the night, he finally regained consciousness in the hospital, in...
Forum: Off Topic - General 08-29-2016, 09:02 PM
Replies: 1,666
Views: 349,391
Posted By Shemp Howard
There I was sitting at the bar staring at my...

There I was sitting at the bar staring at my drink when a large, trouble-making biker steps up next to me, grabs my drink and gulps it down in one swig.

"Well, what are you gonna do about it?" he...
Forum: Off Topic - Trading The Financial Markets 08-28-2016, 11:12 PM
Replies: 9
Views: 727
Posted By Shemp Howard
Don't worry. Push comes to shove, the Fed will...

Don't worry. Push comes to shove, the Fed will start buying corporate debt.
Forum: General Racing Discussion 07-30-2016, 02:51 PM
Replies: 24
Views: 2,023
Posted By Shemp Howard
It's not called the "Pig Penn" for...

It's not called the "Pig Penn" for nothing!!!
Forum: General Racing Discussion 07-30-2016, 02:34 PM
Replies: 19
Views: 1,562
Posted By Shemp Howard
Any predictions on the Beyer?

Any predictions on the Beyer?
Forum: General Racing Discussion 07-25-2016, 08:20 PM
Replies: 14
Views: 1,012
Posted By Shemp Howard
I'd like to know if the trainer has had any...

I'd like to know if the trainer has had any recent purse money held up pending a possible drug test positive for my $10.00.
Forum: General Handicapping Discussion 07-25-2016, 08:08 PM
Replies: 40
Views: 3,656
Posted By Shemp Howard
It was a lot more fun, and profitable, when the...

It was a lot more fun, and profitable, when the grandstand was filled with suckers holding their Clocker Lawton and Stable Boy selection sheets.
Forum: General Racing Discussion 07-23-2016, 05:57 PM
Replies: 13
Views: 921
Posted By Shemp Howard
Brittany on TVG was all choked up announcing the...

Brittany on TVG was all choked up announcing the sad news.
Forum: Off Topic - General 07-23-2016, 05:55 PM
Replies: 8
Views: 490
Posted By Shemp Howard
The solution is to keep electing progressive...

The solution is to keep electing progressive Democrats and follow their orders, komrade.
Forum: Off Topic - General 07-22-2016, 09:03 PM
Replies: 13
Views: 911
Posted By Shemp Howard
"It was so hot in Central Park today, I saw a...

"It was so hot in Central Park today, I saw a squirrel rubbing sunblock on his nuts"
Forum: Off Topic - General 07-18-2016, 08:44 PM
Replies: 68
Views: 5,292
Posted By Shemp Howard
Unless profanity is involved, no one should ever...

Unless profanity is involved, no one should ever be banned for expressing an opinion.
Forum: General Racing Discussion 07-18-2016, 08:40 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 3,490
Posted By Shemp Howard
Was "Chester Pete" one of the assembled...

Was "Chester Pete" one of the assembled mob?
Forum: Off Topic - Sports 07-17-2016, 07:48 AM
Replies: 15
Views: 981
Posted By Shemp Howard
More like a tip-in than a shot, as I recall. Ball...

More like a tip-in than a shot, as I recall. Ball spun around the rim before falling in. Then pandemonium broke loose.
Forum: General Racing Discussion 07-17-2016, 07:29 AM
Replies: 45
Views: 3,156
Posted By Shemp Howard
The best part of trips to Bowie were the gin...

The best part of trips to Bowie were the gin rummy games on the way down.

At $0.05 a point I usually had my day made by the time the train left Philadelphia.

Oh, and betting Tommy Lee in the...
Forum: Off Topic - Sports 07-16-2016, 08:08 PM
Replies: 15
Views: 981
Posted By Shemp Howard
I first saw Nate Thurmond play in the Palestra in...

I first saw Nate Thurmond play in the Palestra in Philadelphia over 50 years ago. Bowling Green was a top ranked team and St. Joe's beat them with the last shot. Butch Komives was the scorer and Nate...
Forum: Off Topic - General 07-15-2016, 08:20 PM
Replies: 10
Views: 539
Posted By Shemp Howard
As a member of NATO, someone in the WH had to...

As a member of NATO, someone in the WH had to green light this.

I wonder who???
Showing results 1 to 25 of 500

 
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