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Search took 0.01 seconds. Search: Posts Made By: Shemp Howard

Forum: Off Topic - General

09-12-2016, 09:17 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

A guy walked into a crowded bar, waving his...

A guy walked into a crowded bar, waving his unholstered pistol and yelled, "I have a 45 caliber Colt 1911 with a seven round clip plus one in the chamber and I want to know who's been sleeping with...

Forum: Off Topic - General

09-01-2016, 08:41 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

Crazy Mike was seriously injured in a freak...

Crazy Mike was seriously injured in a freak accident moving tack from one stable to another. The prognosis was not good.

Late in the night, he finally regained consciousness in the hospital, in...

Forum: Off Topic - General

08-29-2016, 09:02 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

There I was sitting at the bar staring at my...

There I was sitting at the bar staring at my drink when a large, trouble-making biker steps up next to me, grabs my drink and gulps it down in one swig.

"Well, what are you gonna do about it?" he...

Forum: Off Topic - General

07-05-2016, 08:51 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper,...

A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper, Guido, has cheated him out
of $10,000,000.00

His bookkeeper is deaf. That was the reason he got the job in the first
place. It was assumed...

Forum: Off Topic - General

05-31-2016, 08:46 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

One afternoon Bill Clinton was riding in his...

One afternoon Bill Clinton was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the road-side eating grass.

Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and got out to investigate.

He asked one...

Forum: Off Topic - General

03-16-2016, 09:13 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

A set of jumper cables walks in to a crowded bar...

A set of jumper cables walks in to a crowded bar and ask for a drink...

Ok says the bartender, i'll serve you but don't start anything.

Forum: Off Topic - General

03-14-2016, 08:29 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

A Scot was drinking in a bar in London when he...

A Scot was drinking in a bar in London when he gets a call on his cell phone.
He orders drinks for everybody in the bar as he announces, his wife has just produced a typical Scottish baby boy...

Forum: Off Topic - General

12-07-2015, 09:00 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

Did you hear about the Polish Godfather? He...

Did you hear about the Polish Godfather?

He makes you an offer you can't understand

Forum: Off Topic - General

12-06-2015, 05:43 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

That didn't get much of a laugh when my brothers...

That didn't get much of a laugh when my brothers Curly and Moe acted it out 75 years ago.

Forum: Off Topic - General

12-06-2015, 09:03 AM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

A man walks into a store front lawyer's office...

A man walks into a store front lawyer's office and asks, "How much do you charge?"

The lawyer replies, " $250.00 for 3 questions."

Taken aback the man replies, "That's a little steep, don't you...

Forum: Off Topic - General

11-11-2015, 08:17 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

One day out on the golf course, a golfer...

One day out on the golf course, a golfer accidentally overturned his golf cart.

A very attractive woman, who lived in a villa on the golf course, heard the noise, came out onto her balcony and...

Forum: Off Topic - General

07-20-2015, 09:10 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

MLB All-Star Game

Pete Rose received a 90 sec standing ovation after he was introduced before this year's Mid Summer Classic in Cincinnati.

For which Pete was extremely grateful.

He was all over the OVER 1...

Forum: Off Topic - General

06-01-2015, 08:00 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

A very nice, innocent Australian woman wants to...

A very nice, innocent Australian woman wants to get married, but she is only willing to marry a man if he has never had sex with another woman. After several unsuccessful years of searching, she...

Forum: Off Topic - General

01-14-2015, 10:37 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

while messing around the pond, three ducks were...

while messing around the pond, three ducks were arrested and promptly brought to court.

"Name?" judge asks the first duck. "Duck," duck replies. "What are you in for?" judge asks Duck. "Just...

Forum: Off Topic - General

12-16-2014, 09:00 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

The Chauffeur

A young man with his pants hanging half off his ass, two gold front teeth, and a half inch thick gold chain around his neck; walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check.

He marched...

Forum: Off Topic - General

08-26-2014, 09:11 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

A businessman was attending a conference in...

A businessman was attending a conference in Africa. He had a free day and wanted to play a round of golf and was directed to a golf course in the nearby jungle. After a short journey, he arrived at...

Forum: Off Topic - General

02-18-2014, 08:14 PM

Replies: 1,667

HUMOR

Views: 350,965

Posted By Shemp Howard

A little girl walks into a pet shop and asks the...

A little girl walks into a pet shop and asks the clerk in a sweet lisp "Excuthe me, mither, do you have any wittle wabbits for sale?"

Delighted, the shopkeeper asks, "Would you like a wittle white...

Showing results 1 to 17 of 17

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