The economy is so bad that:

[witchdoctor]

I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
I ordered a burger at McDonald’s and the kid behind the counter asked, “Can you afford fries with that?”
CEO’s are now playing miniature golf.
If the bank returns your check marked “Insufficient Funds,” you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children’s names.
A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico .
Motel Six won’t leave the light on anymore.
The Mafia is laying off judges.
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal. Oh Great!! The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear! :bang:
And, finally… I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Lifeline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck

[PhantomOnTour]

Whoa, those are pretty funny man :ThmbUp:

[Tom]

Can you drive a truck? :lol::lol::lol:

[ArlJim78]

those were all great. if you wrote them you should be writing for Jay Leno.

[Mike at A+]

I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
I ordered a burger at McDonald’s and the kid behind the counter asked, “Can you afford fries with that?”
CEO’s are now playing miniature golf.
If the bank returns your check marked “Insufficient Funds,” you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children’s names.
A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico .
Motel Six won’t leave the light on anymore.
The Mafia is laying off judges.
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal. Oh Great!! The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear! :bang:
And, finally… I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Lifeline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck
In the interest of political correctness, you should note that the guy in Pakistan was actually a Catholic.

[witchdoctor]

those were all great. if you wrote them you should be writing for Jay Leno.

I wish I was that funny.

[witchdoctor]

Can you drive a truck? :lol::lol::lol:


Tom
If you do decide to take up their offer, please drive a German truck.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QNlnnIGhu10

[pandy]

That is hysterical, I read it to my wife, LOL.

[TheBid9]

I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
I ordered a burger at McDonald’s and the kid behind the counter asked, “Can you afford fries with that?”
CEO’s are now playing miniature golf.
If the bank returns your check marked “Insufficient Funds,” you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children’s names.
A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico .
Motel Six won’t leave the light on anymore.
The Mafia is laying off judges.
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal. Oh Great!! The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear! :bang:
And, finally… I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Lifeline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck


I could swear I can hear Rodney Dangerfield, great post Doc!!!!

[Lefty]

Witchy, funny stuff. Not to be confused with Sonny Tufts.

[JustRalph]

When I was a kid my Dad carried his money to the grocery store in a thin little wallet. Carried the groceries home in a couple of huge brown paper bags

Now it's the other way around

[Lefty]

When I moved to Vegas in 1976 I walked a mile to a supermarket and bought
$10 worth of groceries. I had a helluvva time lugging those 4 bags all the way that mile home. Now it's a snap to carry $10 in groceries. For a while
I just thought I was getting stronger...