Is it terrible that I don't trust a friend that she says she was raped?

[letswastemoney]

She says there was alcohol involved, but wouldn't go into more details. She lives 5 hours away from me, so I have no physical evidence to go on.

Before condemning my horribleness, here is my logic: If I had consensual sex with someone and they changed their mind and accused me of rape, I'd want people to hear the whole story before deciding I'm a rapist.

Maybe that's bad logic. Maybe it's good. I do not know.

Just the fact that I couldn't take her word without details probably makes me a terrible friend, but I just needed to hear more before condemning a man I've never met before.

So am I horrible.

[newtothegame]

Well there's obviously something (either past or present) that has you doubting what she is saying. But, to ask this forum whether they think your bad or not...(based on the above story), DON"T YOU THINK THE POLICE SHOULD BE INVOLVED????
I can only tell you that I would try to comfort a "friend" and encourage them to get authorities involved. Yes, I understand that rape victims go through alot but I also understand and believe that a rapist will do it again it it goes without consequence!!!
Be there for her....
find why your doubting her.....
encourage her to counseling possibly and authorities.....

[newtothegame]

P.S regarding "you would want your side heard if you were the male".....

THAT'S WHAT THE COURTS ARE FOR....tell it to the judge!!!

[letswastemoney]

P.S regarding "you would want your side heard if you were the male".....

THAT'S WHAT THE COURTS ARE FOR....tell it to the judge!!!
hmmm....i see...

well maybe my initial thought to reserve judgment is extreme then.

[letswastemoney]

Well there's obviously something (either past or present) that has you doubting what she is saying. But, to ask this forum whether they think your bad or not...(based on the above story), DON"T YOU THINK THE POLICE SHOULD BE INVOLVED????
I can only tell you that I would try to comfort a "friend" and encourage them to get authorities involved. Yes, I understand that rape victims go through alot but I also understand and believe that a rapist will do it again it it goes without consequence!!!
Be there for her....
find why your doubting her.....
encourage her to counseling possibly and authorities.....
I was lied to in the past by this girl (it's a different girl than my past girl problem, if anyone remembers that thread)

Haven't girls lied to you before? Just wondering.

Although I do get that yeah I should have comforted her probably.

[newtothegame]

I was lied to in the past by this girl (it's a different girl than my past girl problem, if anyone remembers that thread)

Haven't girls lied to you before? Just wondering.

Although I do get that yeah I should have comforted her probably.

I am sure girls have lied to me in the past.....just as I am sure men (me) lied to them. But I would never lie about something as serious as RAPE. If a friend told me that, even if I questioned her credibility some.....I would have to do what I mentioned above...the truth should come out then...either by her or the courts!

[cj's dad]

IMO - this subject matter is way, way over the top for this web site -

My opinion only.

[Buckeye]

it's a legal question. Testimony would be heard from both sides. Who cares? Some stupid judge would make the decision about who may be at fault. Take it to Court.

[JustRalph]

IMO - this subject matter is way, way over the top for this web site -

My opinion only.

I am glad somebody said it....... I have been trying like hell not to ........

[PaceAdvantage]

I am glad somebody said it....... I have been trying like hell not to ........I agree.

[WinterTriangle]

I agree it's not a subject for this kind of forum, but wanted to just say this:

it's a legal question.

That is correct.

So, letswastemoney, as a friend, you need not be the judge here.

Just be a good friend----lend an ear and provide emotional support if she is hurting.