Horsepicker
01-23-2010, 09:27 PM
Here's how to increase your chance by 3,000% or more to be considered top choice for a head coaching job at the Raiders:
Interviewer: "Thanks for coming in , Mr. Schmo , have a seat. What is your experience?"
Joe Schmo : "A little pee-wee football."
Interviewer: "ok, but where's your references, videos, records?"
Joe Schmo : "Oh, I don't have anything except a bowling trophy."
Interviewer: "Sir, the Raiders don't appreciate our time being wasted, and, in the first place, I don't see how you got this interview in the first place, I'll have to have someone look into that."
"Before I call the security to escort you out, just out of the blue, what , if any, qualifications you have to be a head coach of a major sports franchise and why should we hire you over anyone else in the first place?"
Joe Schmo : "Because I know with every fiber in my being and every ounce of soul I posses that Al Davis is God Almighty, master of all he surveys and I would instantly and without fail kill my wife , children and my unborn child at just the HINT of him saying so with absolutely no reservations."
Interviewer: ( picks up phone ) "Secretary, cancel all future appointments and interviews for head coaching job and begin posting that a NEW head coach has just been named".
" Congratulations and Welcome to the Raiders...., COACH."
Horsepicker
Interviewer: "Thanks for coming in , Mr. Schmo , have a seat. What is your experience?"
Joe Schmo : "A little pee-wee football."
Interviewer: "ok, but where's your references, videos, records?"
Joe Schmo : "Oh, I don't have anything except a bowling trophy."
Interviewer: "Sir, the Raiders don't appreciate our time being wasted, and, in the first place, I don't see how you got this interview in the first place, I'll have to have someone look into that."
"Before I call the security to escort you out, just out of the blue, what , if any, qualifications you have to be a head coach of a major sports franchise and why should we hire you over anyone else in the first place?"
Joe Schmo : "Because I know with every fiber in my being and every ounce of soul I posses that Al Davis is God Almighty, master of all he surveys and I would instantly and without fail kill my wife , children and my unborn child at just the HINT of him saying so with absolutely no reservations."
Interviewer: ( picks up phone ) "Secretary, cancel all future appointments and interviews for head coaching job and begin posting that a NEW head coach has just been named".
" Congratulations and Welcome to the Raiders...., COACH."
Horsepicker