View Full Version : What in the "WOODS" is going on
CryingForTheHorses
12-08-2009, 08:01 PM
WOW never gave golf a glance until Tiger came along.Story is now up to 10 claiming to have a piece of the Tiger.Poor wife must feel like a kicked rat as new alligations of Tiger endowed like a "9" iron sends his motherinlaw to the hospital with stomach pains.Talk about a "Fall from Grace".
Rookies
12-08-2009, 08:12 PM
Gatorade discontinuing Tiger Woods drink
December 8, 2009 4:06 PM CT
Tribune News Services
Gatorade says it is discontinuing its Tiger Woods drink, but says it made the decision before the golfer's car accident led to a media firestorm surrounding his personal life." made the decision BEFORE the golfer's accident " riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigggghhhtttt...:lol: :rolleyes:
Tiger got a 10?
Wow, that's 9 over par! :lol:
exactaplayer
12-08-2009, 08:32 PM
Lets make this easy on the ladies, raise your hand if you haven't had sex with Tiger.
bigmack
12-08-2009, 08:50 PM
This guy is an official joke at this point. If he comes to San D in late January I will personally attend the event with 2 mildly attractive pancake waitresses & heckle him the entire 36/72 holes depending on him making the cut.
Slide over Bub, Daly is back! At least this guy told it like it was. In his book the editor had to tone down several sections as Johnny Boy went into great detail about his philandering, three-somes, et al.
http://i165.photobucket.com/albums/u70/macktime/12_8_09_17_39_08.png
Slacks provided by Earl Schlub's Loud Wear.
http://sports.yahoo.com/golf/blog/devil_ball_golf/post/John-Daly-is-slimmed-down-and-fired-up-for-Holly?urn=golf,207433
ezrabrooks
12-08-2009, 09:06 PM
Now compromising pictures of Tiger? GGM, what's next?
This guy is an official joke at this point. If he comes to San D in late January I will personally attend the event with 2 mildly attractive pancake waitresses & heckle him the entire 36/72 holes depending on him making the cut.
Tiger likes pancakes, but he loves pigs in a blanket!
ba boom!
What's the difference between Tiger and Santa Claus?
Santa stops after three Ho's!
ba boom!
BlueShoe
12-09-2009, 01:02 AM
Did you happen to hear that Mr. Woods is going to change his name?Yes indeed,from now on he will be known as--Cheetah Woods.
delayjf
12-09-2009, 11:51 AM
Rush Limbaugh is claiming that anyone associated with the PGA knows this has been going on for sometime. Given Jasper Parnevik's harsh comments about Woods, leads me to believe it's probably true.
bigmack
12-10-2009, 03:02 PM
I would guess most of these gals wouldn't score all that high on Jeopardy.
Jamie Jungers, the blonde lingerie model tells The Sun about her “crazy sex” with Tiger. The two met in June 2005. “We ended up having crazy sex,” Jungers said. “I remember him picking me up and putting me against the wall.” Meanwhile Tiger’s other Jaimee, Jamiee Grubbs, apologizes to his wife Elin, saying “I couldn’t describe how remorseful that I am to have hurt her family and her emotionally.” But, she adds, “If it wasn’t me, it was going to be other girls.” :lol:
I can hear the call, Hi Tiger this is Jamie
Woods: Jungers or Grubbs?
ezrabrooks
12-10-2009, 03:33 PM
This guy is an official joke at this point. If he comes to San D in late January I will personally attend the event with 2 mildly attractive pancake waitresses & heckle him the entire 36/72 holes depending on him making the cut.
Slide over Bub, Daly is back! At least this guy told it like it was. In his book the editor had to tone down several sections as Johnny Boy went into great detail about his philandering, three-somes, et al.
http://i165.photobucket.com/albums/u70/macktime/12_8_09_17_39_08.png
Slacks provided by Earl Schlub's Loud Wear.
http://sports.yahoo.com/golf/blog/devil_ball_golf/post/John-Daly-is-slimmed-down-and-fired-up-for-Holly?urn=golf,207433
Big John has taken off a few pounds..
[/url]
ratedId ="Vzr0LdTvqaW;3.0;0";single_rater();
[url="http://www.zimbio.com/pictures/pUFS8LlCVOs/2009+Australian+Open+Day+3/oWtWcXIxg4R/John+Daly"]http://www4.pictures.zimbio.com/gi/2009+Australian+Open+Day+3+oWtWcXIxg4Rl.jpg (http://www.zimbio.com/John+Daly/share?Content=/John+Daly/articles/Vzr0LdTvqaW/Will+John+Daly+Weight+Loss+Lead+Movie)
Dave Schwartz
12-10-2009, 05:49 PM
I can hear the call, Hi Tiger this is Jamie
Woods: Jungers or Grubbs?
Or...
Woods: Can I buy a vowel, please? Can I have an "E" Vanna?
bigmack
12-11-2009, 06:59 PM
http://i165.photobucket.com/albums/u70/macktime/12_11_09_15_57_18.png
098poi
12-11-2009, 07:13 PM
Gatorade discontinuing Tiger Woods drink
December 8, 2009 4:06 PM CT
Tribune News Services
Gatorade says it is discontinuing its Tiger Woods drink, but says it made the decision before the golfer's car accident led to a media firestorm surrounding his personal life." made the decision BEFORE the golfer's accident " riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigggghhhtttt...:lol: :rolleyes:
Good decision, the slogan, "Is it in you?" doesn't quite sound the way it once did!
RaceBookJoe
12-11-2009, 07:37 PM
So does this mean that Tiger is about to celebrate the " 12 Days of Mistress " rbj
Valuist
12-11-2009, 07:41 PM
Ever wonder if Tiger was on roids? We remember how skinny he was. Yes, one can definitely get bigger thru weights, but he has a bit of the "bloated look". He has (or had) a smokin hot wife, but that wasn't enough. He had to have women everywhere. His terrible temper is well known. Is it a stretch that he too, was on steroids?
Greyfox
12-11-2009, 08:02 PM
Entrepreneurs.
If I lived in any city that had a PGA tournament, I'd be selling:
"I NEVER SLEPT WITH TIGER" TEE SHIRTS.
They might make great "stocking stuffers" :lol: too.
CryingForTheHorses
12-11-2009, 08:09 PM
http://i165.photobucket.com/albums/u70/macktime/12_11_09_15_57_18.png
The sad thing is,The damage has been done.How could you ever look at him the same way as before.Tiger went from a Hero to a zero
Valuist
12-11-2009, 08:18 PM
Was he really viewed as a hero? Was Jordan? They were viewed as great competitors; win at all cost types. But if you hear the stories, neither of them could ever be considered "nice guys". They aren't likeable people and they view others as commodities for their use.
Old Sparky
12-11-2009, 09:08 PM
Was he really viewed as a hero? Was Jordan? They were viewed as great competitors; win at all cost types. But if you hear the stories, neither of them could ever be considered "nice guys". They aren't likeable people and they view others as commodities for their use.
:ThmbUp: :ThmbUp: :ThmbUp: remember gambling and jordan and dark sunglassess --- what a--h---- :mad: :mad: :mad: but he is americas elite HANES UNDERWEAR FU OS out
PaceAdvantage
12-12-2009, 12:07 AM
:ThmbUp: :ThmbUp: :ThmbUp: remember gambling and jordan and dark sunglassess --- what a--h---- :mad: :mad: :mad: but he is americas elite HANES UNDERWEAR FU OS outAre these sorts of replies meant to be "edgy?"
Golf and Horses
12-12-2009, 02:24 AM
Tiger likes pancakes, but he loves pigs in a blanket!
ba boom!
What's the difference between Tiger and Santa Claus?
Santa stops after three Ho's!
ba boom!
Another 1st for Tiger....The 1st golfer to ever hit a tree and 12 women fell out!
kenwoodallpromos
12-12-2009, 02:42 AM
Give away all your money, date neighborhood crack addicts instead of bar workers, and no one will care!!
cj's dad
12-12-2009, 07:01 AM
In a somewhat related story, Tyrell Suggs of the Baltimore Ravens was charged with assaulting his girlfriend (an Af.-American) by holding her on the floor and pouring BLEACH on her.
Tyrell claimed he was only attempting to "get myself a white woman like Tiger has".
ezrabrooks
12-12-2009, 10:45 AM
Give away all your money, date neighborhood crack addicts instead of bar workers, and no one will care!!
I guess you are right....as long as you don't come into people's living room hawking products...like a gutter whore..
Obama was given an award by Norwegians this week.
But Tiger, he was crowned by a Swede! :D
ezrabrooks
12-12-2009, 11:17 AM
British law firm Schillings, which specializes in protecting the reputations of celebrities, obtained the injunction on Woods' behalf on Thursday at the High Court in London, partner Simon Smith told Reuters by phone on Friday.
A letter from the lawyers accompanying the injunction contains a statement that "this Order is not to be taken as an admission that any such photographs exist." Huh?
Greyfox
12-12-2009, 11:20 AM
Tiger went from a Hero to a zero.
The problem with today's society is as a whole it confuses
heroes and stars.
Sports players, film celebs, and in your face Presidents and so on are not heroes.
At best they are stars.
We have lots of true heroes in our midst.
Several local fire fighters, military, and police would qualify.
Several individual citizens who show bravery.
Woods is a star, not a hero.
098poi
12-12-2009, 11:21 AM
Obama was given an award by Norwegians this week.
But Tiger, he was crowned by a Swede! :D
Good one. :D
LottaKash
12-12-2009, 12:41 PM
The problem with today's society is as a whole it confuses
heroes and stars.
Sports players, film celebs, and in your face Presidents and so on are not heroes.
At best they are stars.
We have lots of true heroes in our midst.
Several local fire fighters, military, and police would qualify.
Several individual citizens who show bravery.
Woods is a star, not a hero.
Well Put Grey-One....An addicted to "sex"-star, at that....
best,
lilmegahertz
12-12-2009, 03:50 PM
A close up of a man running. He dives into his Jeep Cherokee. As he drives away, he glances in his rear view mirror. He sees a woman chasing after him swinging a golf club. She falls further and further back. Then a voice-over says " You can outrun your wife in a Jeep."
Truth in advertising - he is a POS bottom feeding jerk. The kind of person you point to and tell your kids to stay away from. I hope the miserable excuse of a person losing it all and ends up washing dishes. He is a bad role model and the more bad that befalls him, the better off society will be. You do not want kids emulating low lives like Tiger.
Overlay
12-17-2009, 08:41 AM
I hope the miserable excuse of a person losing it all and ends up washing dishes.
Speaking of dishes, every situation has its economic upside (in this case for the commemorative souvenir industry):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jkOYF7Un_iM
hazzardm
12-17-2009, 01:44 PM
It is near the Christmas break of the school year. The students have
turned in all their work and there is really nothing more to do. All the
children are restless and the teacher decides to have an early
dismissal.
Teacher: "Whoever answers the questions I ask, first and correctly can
leave early today."
Little Johnny says to himself "Good, I want to get the hell outta here. I'm smart and will answer the question."
Teacher: "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, "Abraham Lincoln."
Teacher: "That's right Susie, you can go home."
Johnny is mad that Susie answered the question first.
Teacher: "Who said 'I Have a Dream'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary says, "Martin Luther King."
Teacher: "That's right Mary, you can go."
Johnny is even madder than before.
Teacher: "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Nancy says, "John F. Kennedy."
Teacher: "That's right Nancy, you may also leave."
Johnny is mad as hell that he has not been able to answer to any of the
questions.
When the teacher turns her back Johnny says, "I wish these bitches would
keep their mouths shut!"
The teacher turns around: "NOW WHO SAID THAT?"
Johnny: "TIGER WOODS. CAN I GO NOW?"
trying2win
12-17-2009, 09:08 PM
What's the difference between Tiger and Santa Claus?
Santa stops after three Ho's!
:lol: Good one, Tom.
T2W
Today, Tiger was formally removed fro the Ryder Cup Team.
They were upset that he has been beaten repeatedly by a European.
ba dum
Trotman
12-18-2009, 09:34 AM
Some good jokes in this thread.Earlier Ezrabrooks posted with regards to Schillings Law Firm,he probably has heard that two of the worlds largest news magazines have now pooled their legal resources in preparation for the announcement of how Earl is part of this unfolding story and this is Tiger's major concern rather than what his ex is going to get. This just keeps getting better,I can't think of a better person that all this could happen to. Hey Tiger when you open the Christmas stocking that's not two lumps of coal your feeling it's your B**** :lol:
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