falconridge
03-07-2009, 12:36 AM
I would not move to end any March 6 without paying tribute to the great Ringgold Wilmer Lardner,* born in Niles, Michigan on this day in 1885. No one wrote better of baseball ("You Know Me Al," "Lose With a Smile," "My Roomy," "Alibi Ike," "Hurry Kane," and numerous other short stories), horse racing ("The Big Town"), boxing ("Champion," "Battle of the Century"), "barberism" ("Haircut"), and a great many other things. To the undefeated, undisputed champion, let's raise a bourbon highball (Ring's favorite drink), or, better still, have another look at the man's unsurpassed serio-comic genius. Here's an excerpt from one of his plays, which bears my all-time favorite title:
I GASPIRI
(The Upholsterers)
A Drama in Three Acts
Adapted from the Bukovinian of Casper Redmonda
CHARACTERS
IAN OBRI, a Blotter Saleman
JOHAN WASPER, his wife
GRETA, their daughter
HERBERT SWOPE, a nonentity
FFENA, their daughter, later their wife
EGSO, a Pencil Guster
TONO, a Typical Wastebasket
ACT I
(A public street in a bathroom. A man named Tupper has evidently just taken a bath. A man named Brindle is now taking a bath. A man named Newburn comes out of the faucet which has been left running. He exits through the exhaust. Two strangers to each other meet on the bath mat.)
FIRST STRANGER: Where was you born?
SECOND STRANGER: Out of wedlock.
FIRST STRANGER: That's a mighty pretty country around there.
SECOND STRANGER: Are you married?
FIRST STRANGER: I don't know. There's a woman living with me, but I can't place her.
(Three outsiders named Klein go across the stage three times. They think they are in a public library. A woman's cough is heard off-stage left.)
A NEW CHARACTER: Who is that cough?
TWO MOORS: That is my cousin. She died a little while ago in a haphazard way.
A GREEK: And what a woman she was!
(The curtain is lowered for seven days to denote the lapse of a week.)
* * *
http://www.gtsav.gatech.edu/students/studentcenter/images/november07/ring
Ring Lardner (1885-1933)
*Nor would my pal Overlay, who called me--for what by my count is the 30th consecutive March 6--this morning to wish me a happy Ring Lardner Day. :) :ThmbUp: :cool:
I GASPIRI
(The Upholsterers)
A Drama in Three Acts
Adapted from the Bukovinian of Casper Redmonda
CHARACTERS
IAN OBRI, a Blotter Saleman
JOHAN WASPER, his wife
GRETA, their daughter
HERBERT SWOPE, a nonentity
FFENA, their daughter, later their wife
EGSO, a Pencil Guster
TONO, a Typical Wastebasket
ACT I
(A public street in a bathroom. A man named Tupper has evidently just taken a bath. A man named Brindle is now taking a bath. A man named Newburn comes out of the faucet which has been left running. He exits through the exhaust. Two strangers to each other meet on the bath mat.)
FIRST STRANGER: Where was you born?
SECOND STRANGER: Out of wedlock.
FIRST STRANGER: That's a mighty pretty country around there.
SECOND STRANGER: Are you married?
FIRST STRANGER: I don't know. There's a woman living with me, but I can't place her.
(Three outsiders named Klein go across the stage three times. They think they are in a public library. A woman's cough is heard off-stage left.)
A NEW CHARACTER: Who is that cough?
TWO MOORS: That is my cousin. She died a little while ago in a haphazard way.
A GREEK: And what a woman she was!
(The curtain is lowered for seven days to denote the lapse of a week.)
* * *
http://www.gtsav.gatech.edu/students/studentcenter/images/november07/ring
Ring Lardner (1885-1933)
*Nor would my pal Overlay, who called me--for what by my count is the 30th consecutive March 6--this morning to wish me a happy Ring Lardner Day. :) :ThmbUp: :cool: