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chickenhead
06-08-2007, 11:25 AM
Dog's Diary

8:00 am- Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am- A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am- A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am- Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing
12:00 pm- Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm- Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm- Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm- Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm- Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm- Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm- Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!


Excerpts from a Cat's Diary

Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed
hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly
demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made
condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am.


There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was
placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I
could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my
confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this
means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.
The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and
seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The
bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the
guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now...

GaryG
06-08-2007, 11:42 AM
That is right on the money....:lol:

Greyfox
06-08-2007, 12:19 PM
:lol: Great stuff.

Both are intelligent animals. Having had both I noticed:
1. I trained the dog.
2. The cat trained me.

JustRalph
06-08-2007, 02:35 PM
the cat sounds like Stewie on Family Guy..............

Tom
06-08-2007, 02:44 PM
I always had the feeling my cats took me in and decided to let me stay in my house after they found me.;)

Gibbon
06-08-2007, 04:14 PM
“Meow” means “woof” in cat.







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