Election Humor

[boxcar]

An online friend of mine sent this funny:

Time to come together.

There are less than three months until the election,
an election that will decide the next President of the
United States. The man elected will be the president
of ALL Americans, not just the Democrats or the
Republicans. To show our solidarity as Americans,
let's all get together and show each other our support
for the candidate of our choice. It's time that we all
came together, Democrats and Republicans alike. If you
support the policies and character of President George
Bush, please drive with your headlights 'ON' during
the day. If you support John Kerry, please drive with
your headlights 'OFF' at night.

[boxcar]

The bumper sticker reads:

Run Hillary Run

The Dems would display it proudly on their rear bumber, while the Repubs would gladly display it on their front bumper.

Boxcar

[boxcar]

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."

The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude."

She rolled her eyes and said, "You must be a Republican."

"I am," replied the man. "How did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is
technically correct, but I have no idea what to do with your
information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me."

The man smiled and responded, "You must be a Democrat."

"I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?"

"Well," said the man, "you don't know where you are or where you're going. You've risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you
were in before we met but, somehow, now it's my fault."

[chickenhead]

I've seen that last one before...just replace Republican with engineer....and Democrat with sales...