10th race at Parx was a match race

[Elliott Sidewater]

It was reported on the radio that a thief scooped up about $50,000 in high denomination chips from a gaming table at Parx Casino and made a run for it. There wasn't a lot of suspense, the thief (at odds of 1 to 100) was in his 20's wearing a track jacket and a new pair of Nike's, and the nearest (only?) security guard (99-1) was a 73 year old man with a pacemaker, described as a "Wilford Brimley look-alike". Before you could say winner winner chicken dinner, the thief was out the door winging toward his car, and safely out of there after speeding down Smarty Jones Blvd. Thinking that this was the perfect crime, I was surprised to hear an update a few minutes ago saying the thief was caught. But here the story takes a turn, the radio news guy was mistaken.... another station reported that the whole thing was caught on tape. It doesn't take a genius to figure out what happens next - purses are going to be cut again. And Steve Miller's song Take the Money and Run will be permanently banned. Boy, I'd like to be a fly on the wall when the PA state gaming commission shows up to ask some very pointed questions about the biggest minus pool the facility has ever had.

[Vinman]

It was reported on the radio that a thief scooped up about $50,000 in high denomination chips from a gaming table at Parx Casino and made a run for it. There wasn't a lot of suspense, the thief (at odds of 1 to 100) was in his 20's wearing a track jacket and a new pair of Nike's, and the nearest (only?) security guard (99-1) was a 73 year old man with a pacemaker, described as a "Wilford Brimley look-alike". Before you could say winner winner chicken dinner, the thief was out the door winging toward his car, and safely out of there after speeding down Smarty Jones Blvd. Thinking that this was the perfect crime, I was surprised to hear an update a few minutes ago saying the thief was caught. But here the story takes a turn, the radio news guy was mistaken.... another station reported that the whole thing was caught on tape. It doesn't take a genius to figure out what happens next - purses are going to be cut again. And Steve Miller's song Take the Money and Run will be permanently banned. Boy, I'd like to be a fly on the wall when the PA state gaming commission shows up to ask some very pointed questions about the biggest minus pool the facility has ever had.

Well played.

[castaway01]

Cute story. Stealing chips and being caught on tape doing it when you have to return to the scene of the crime to cash in the chips = not the smartest criminal on the planet.

[thespaah]

The guy really made it out of the building to the parking lot?
Unreal. Time for Parx to hire Mikey, Pauly and a few other Mooks who use their own brand of "security".
http://www.hark.com/casino/throw-him-in-the-alley-and-just-tell-the-cops-he-got-hit-by-a-car
http://www.hark.com/casino/i-want-you-to-exit-this-guy-off-the-premises

[thespaah]

Cute story. Stealing chips and being caught on tape doing it when you have to return to the scene of the crime to cash in the chips = not the smartest criminal on the planet.
If the guy was smart, and he's probably not, he would hire 10 people, pay them 10% to go in at random intervals to mingle ,play a bit and then cash in the chips in small increments. It make take a while, but he'd get most of what he stole.

[appistappis]

high denom chips was his mistake, he will never be able to cash them.

[thespaah]

high denom chips was his mistake, he will never be able to cash them.
Dummy. Oh well.

[burnsy]

Once he gets out of jail.....he will work at valet parking. Hes the fastest guy in the parking lot.

[FantasticDan]

Sad sack turns himself in:

http://www.phillyburbs.com/my_town/bensalem/police-brooklyn-man-charged-in-k-parx-casino-chip-caper/article_1f4ccde4-ea84-5200-bc8e-25f18e07a113.html

“However, he did mention that ‘his mind was mush,’ ” according to the affidavit.
He must play the horses too! :p