Let's get back to making this a positive site

[trying2win]

"Life is very short and there's no time
for fussing and fighting, my friend" (lyrics from a Beatles song)


--PA, you're doing the best you can. Thank you for your efforts. You're right, you can't please everyone. Just like the old cliche,
it seems sometimes you're damned if you do and damned if you don't.

--I think someone mentioned something awhile back, that most members that post here are pretty decent except for when there are some heated topics about politics. Some people can sure quickly change from being a Dr. Jekyll to a Mr. Hyde, when it comes to some political discussions. That's why I prefer not to read those political threads.

--There seems to be three groups of people at this PA site:

1. A few super nice people that we really like. They're personable, they go the extra mile to help you with some handicapping topics with their posts, P.M.'s and e-mails. Some of their posts are brilliant and thought-provoking. Some of these members have a great sense of humor too. Just genuinely nice people that really stand out in a crowd.

2. This second group I think, comprises most of the members here. Decent folk who like playing the races, contribute a post once in awhile. Nothing extraordinary, but they seem to be
personable which is a bonus.

3. This is the unenlightened group of people that have irritating traits like:

--Consistently writing drivel at this site (if you don't know what "drivel" means, look it up at www.dictionary.com)

--Resort to name-calling when someone criticizes one of their posts etc. Nothing wrong with disagreeing on some things, but you can disagree without being disagreeable. Some members need to read Dale Carnegie's great book "How to Win Friends and Influence People".

--Posting unsubstantiated claims of alleged race fixing etc.

--Posting gobbledygook columns of horse racing topics of one sort or another, and adamantly arguing they're "right" in their opinions and that everybody else is wrong. Which reminds me of that question from Dr. Gerald Jampolsky..."Would you rather be right, or would you rather be happy?". Or another way I think Dr. Jampolsky could have said it...Would you rather be right, or would you rather have peace of mind?

--Members bragging about their ROI's with an air of superiority.
Nothing wrong with telling us about some of your recent big winners or your positive ROI numbers (I'm happy for you in that regard) but, could some members please tell us about your big-priced winners or positive ROI's in a less exalted way. Hint...could you be more humble about it?

--Being generally negative about too many things.


There's some irony involved with being a PA member too. I've had an attitude change toward some of the people I had prevously
thought had some irritating traits. To my surprise, some of these members I was critical of, were quite willing to help me with various topics I needed some advice on. See, I make mistakes too. Yes, I have my faults. One of them is being too judgmental at times.

I don't blame PA, if he wants to cancel membership privileges for some members. That's something we should remember...i.e. this is a privilege to be a member here, not a right.

I quit posting here for quite awhile last year, then resumed when I noticed that a lot of the trouble makers had gone away. Things went fine for quite awhile, but it seems things are starting to slip somewhat again with air of negativity on some issues.

So, let's help PA all we can. Let's contribute positive things to this site. Let's help one another with some advice etc. (you don't have to give away your trade secrets for winning at the races). Let's post interesting things here. Let's have a few laughs. Let's
make this site a place where we look forward to visiting on a regular basis once again. What do you say?

Thanks,

T2W

[shanta]

your post is right on the money.to be on this site is a priviledge and thanx for reminding me of that.i have learned a lot here about things that are not strengths of mine and i am grateful for that.i also have developed some friendships through e mails and private messages with people i would have never had the chance to correspond with.I am very thankful for this last part.

Richie:)

[alysheba88]

If people are unhappy and miserable in being here they should simply leave. Never understood the logic for staying someplace you hate or dont like.

Its like being invited to a party and spending the whole time bitching and moaning about the people there. Its like they get enjoyment in their unhappiness and want to drag down others.

[Figman]

Alysheba - right on!
I love horse racing...been in the business 50 years....am smart enough to realize that there is always something new coming down the 'pike most days. Thanks to PA's Board I have often picked up info that I have overlooked or that info is not available elsewhere. Whether totally serious or chocked full of humor.....you find it all here on PA's Board. We are indebted to him for perservering and all posters should respect that fact. If you don't have a legitimate question, an interesting opinion, a solid fact or story to share or a truthful answer...DON'T POST!

[Foolish Pleasure]

Ray sorry to see you enduring so much grief. I haven't been by in a while, maybe I'll stop in more frequently and see if my usual temperate and considrate posting techiniques will spread to others.

ROTFLMAO

[jjgold]

Well boys inexperienced poster here but I do oppose fighting and violence on the board. Lets stay positive and teach each other a few things

[highnote]

Here I go again, but I learned this gem from Sartin's "Psychology of Winning" audiotapes.

People start arguments for a reason. A person who tries to start an argument is looking for a payoff. In order to get the psychological payoff they must draw another person into the argument. While engaged in the argument each person can play one of 3 roles. Sartin uses a triangle to help the listener visualize the process.

He gives names to the roles each person can play and he places these names on the three corners of triangle -- persecutor, rescuer and victim.

Usually the person starting the argument is the "persecutor". They make statements like "you're wrong", "betting closers are for losers", "there is absolutely no value in Beyer figures", etc.

(I'm making these up -- I'm not intentionally quoting anyone from this board.)

By making these statements or accusations they are hoping someone will reply. The person who replies is called the "victim". The victim will respond by saying, "How dare you say I'm a loser because I bet closers". Or "I make a lot of money betting last race Beyer figs".

The persecutor has dragged the victim onto the triangle. This bickering will go on until it escalates, one person drops out, or one person becomes the "rescuer". However, by becoming the "rescuer" the game on the triangle continues.

The victim might become rescuer by saying, "You're right. It's better to always bet front runners." Depending on what the persecutor says, the persecutor can take on any of the three roles. He can continue persecuting, he can become a victim by saying, "But I was only trying to help". Or he can become the rescuer by saying "No you're right, I was being too hard on you".

The best thing to do is not argue with these types of people. Just smile and move on to the next post. If you ignore them they go away -- psychologically unfilled. Maybe they'll end up on Yahoo chat or something to try and pick another fight.

That's all the Sartin stuff I'll talk about. And BTW, he probably got it from Carl Jung. :)